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Joke of the Day

"China Joke So I was walking around the other day and I saw a Chinese guy fall out of a 2nd story window. I ran up and in English yelled, ""Are you ok?!?"" He replied, ""I am fine, thank you, and you?"""

"People always ask me why I quit my job as a can crusher... Well it was just soda-pressing!"

"I always feel bad for seedless watermelons, because what if they wanted babies?"

"My mother once told me to get rid of the assholes in my life She then complains that I never contact her."

"Richard Nixon makes a really awful dinner for his wife. He defends himself by saying ""I am not a cook""."

"Lady:(standing in the middle of a busy street) Officer can you tell me how to get to the Hospital? Officer: Just stand where you are!!!"

"A seven year old walks into a bar nes and noble."

"I like my women like I like my dragons... Jealous, naked, and atop a bunch of gold."

"I know a good joke about hipsters. You've probably never heard it."

"What is it called when foreign girls spread their legs? I call it the British open."