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Joke of the Day

"I like my women like I like my rice.... ....Hot, white, and lifeless."

"I once had a llama."

"What do you do when you want to golf in a thunderstorm? Hold up a 1 Iron. Not even God can hit a 1 iron."

"HEY YOU GUYS! Last chance to date me before I call it a day and start wearing socks under sandals."

"If I ever wake up miniature I'm going to use a ravioli as a pillow and just go back to bed."

"I just saved a bunch of money on my car insurance by switching... ...my car into reverse and driving away from the accident."

"Pizza jokes are all about delivery."

"With virtually no power, there still comes a surprisingly large amount of responsibility."

"You call it nervousness or having the jitters. I call it, I think my body was possessed by a meth addict in detox. Samesies?"

"How can you tell if a dictionary has been working out? You can see the definition."