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Joke of the Day

"Maybe I'm the good kind of fat like an avocado."

"I went to a premature ejaculation clinic... ... but there was no one there. Guess I came too early."

"What did the suicide bomber instructor say to his class? Now pay attention class, I'm only going to do this once."

"Lawyer: ""What is your date of birth?"" Witness: ""July 15th."" Lawyer: ""What year?"" Witness: ""Every year."""

"My wife just accused me of being big-headed and thinking I was better than I was. I nearly fell off my throne."

"What's the difference between a violinist and a fiddler? How red their necks are."

"what's the difference between a vagina and your joke? Nothing. They both stink!"

"My cat's staring at the wall again. Either she can see ghosts, or she's mulling over past social situations she wishes she'd handled better."

"Whats the most important aspect of gun safety to practice around a feminist? Trigger discipline"

"I tried to think of an electricity pun Now my head hertz"