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Joke of the Day

"What did the suicide bomber instructor say to his class? Now pay attention class, I'm only going to do this once."

Next Joke
 
"A cop pulled me over and said ''Papers...'' So I said, ''Scissors, I win!'' and drove off like a boss!"
"*rubs lamp* *genie comes out* You get 3 wishes. Just no wishing for more wishes. ""I wish for more genies."" I SAID NO WI- oooh, you're good."
"Nice try little pine tree air freshener, but this gas station restroom needs the efforts of an entire forest."
"If Donald Trump runs the U.S into the ground... He will have toupee"
"The grocery store employees who stock the milk from behind the coolers don't like it when you grab their hands just to see if they're clean."
"What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting injected with tetanus."
"Why did the skull not want to go to prom, but still did? He didn't have any *body* to go with But he still really wanted to bone."
"What do you call a obese fortune teller? A fortune teller, you FPHer!!!"
"If you post BDSM jokes on /r/jokes.... Does it count as a submission?"