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Joke of the Day

"I went to a premature ejaculation clinic... ... but there was no one there. Guess I came too early."

"The real difference between Obama and Trump Obama makes jokes. Trump is a joke."

"I used to go to New Years Eve parties I still do, but I used to too! -Mitch Hedberg style-"

"whoever decided how to spell camouflage is a terrible terrible person"

"Homosexuals should be like my shirts when I'm not wearing them - quietly tucked away in the closet."

"Whenever I fill out an application, in the part that says ""If an emergency, notify:"" I put ""DOCTOR"". What's my mother going to do?"

"An Asian man's wife died He couldn't bereave it."

"I was going to tell a joke about sodium... But then I said ""Na, I'll do it later."""

"Freudian Slip... I got divorced over a Freudian slip. I meant to say, ""Please pass the salt"" but I said, ""You rotten bitch, you ruined my life."" (I think that's a Jackie Mason joke)"

"In Soviet Russia... Light turns you on..."