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Joke of the Day
"Where did the Indian buy his sandwiches? The New Dehli"
Next Joke
"My favorite musician pun ||: lather, rinse :||"
"[goes back in time to murder baby Hitler] wow long line of people here to kill him [goes back to murder myself] how is this line even longer"
"Tell me more about how awful dubstep is, generation that celebrated disco."
"Captain: You're suspended. Turn in ur badge and gun. [he does, but immediately grows a new badge and gun] Godammit, u were born to be a cop."
"If apples come from apple seeds and tomatoes come from tomato seeds, how come nothing is sprouting from the bird seeds I planted?"
"My mom yelled at my sister "" GET OUTTA MY PURSE!""... My sister yelled back ""I'M TOO BIG TO BE IN YOU'RE PURSE!"""
"I will not eat a donut. I will not eat a donut. I will not eat... I will not eat a third donut. I will not eat a third donut."
"[school teacher job interview] Can I ask you some questions? I don't know CAN you? haha impressive [stands] welcome aboard!"
"Did you know that in any given group, only 9/10 of people understand basic math? The other 3% doesn't."