114863
Joke of the Day
"My favorite musician pun ||: lather, rinse :||"
Next Joke
"Most of the lies I tell aren't even true."
"Personal ad: Handsome man (29), seeks short, open minded women to poke him in the eye with umbrellas. Busy streets only. No names please."
"An alcoholic walks into a candy store... then a table, then a chair, floor."
"GOD: for this to work, I need them to feel love CUPID: how about I shoot them through the heart with an arrow? GOD: ur starting to worry me"
"Sure laying me down on a ""Bed of Roses"" sounds all romantic and shit, but I much rather lay on a bed of fries and onion rings."
"Next time you're not feeling hungry, tell yourself you're going on a diet in an hour & you'll unleash the starving African child inside you."
"When a package says ""Easy Open"" I end up using scissors, knife, hammer, gun and a lightsaber."
"New study reveals that women actually make better archaeologist. They're always digging up old shit."
"""NSFW"" Why do you put a baby in a blender feet first? So you can cum on its face afterwards."