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Joke of the Day
"How many Californians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Hella."
Next Joke
"My German friend brought his newly-bought laptop to me... ...and said ""I shouldn't have bought one with a English keyboard. Can you tell me what this is?"" He then pointed at the space bar."
"A guy called into work on his last day there and says, ""Hey, boss! What's the difference between work and your daughter?"" ... ""I'm not coming into work this morning."
"[me on a ledge] COP: (through megaphone) WE'VE CALLED SOMEONE WHO CAN HELP! *Kris Kross steps out of a police van*"
"2000 years ago somewhere in the Middle East 'I do not care who your father is. When I am out here fishing you do not walk on the water...'"
"Waitress dad jokes When waitress comes to the table ask if she takes orders ,""to go""? If she says yes respond with, ""Great! Get your purse we're leaving."""
"Shoutout to toilet paper... ...for always being there for me while I'm having a shitty day."
"My girlfriend's dad asked me how hard it is being a philosopher. It's quite easy to love your daughter."
"I like my girls how I like my wine Ten-fifteen years old and locked in my basement."
"Have you heard the one about the misaddressed letter? You might not get it."