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Joke of the Day
"What's the difference between Michael Phelps and Hitler? Michael Phelps can finish a race."
Next Joke
"Someone stole my mood ring I don't know how I feel about that"
"me: could my thighs get any bigger? *sits down* me: oh look now they're the size of Australia"
"What does a gamer say when he get married? GG."
"Me: We need to hire smarter people. HR: Why? Me: Is there someone smarter I can talk to about this? HR..."
"Why does the Easter Bunny hide his eggs? Because he doesn't want anyone to know he's screwing a chicken."
"Right before I left the house my wife asked me if I filled out my organ donor information and now I'm hesitant to start the car."
"First Caribou: Which bug gobbles up trash? Second Caribou: The litterbug."
"Did you hear about the lady who walked backwards into an airplane propeller? Disassedher"
"I don't understand why people say ""Oh it's just walking distance away"" Everything is walking distance if you have the time."