37652

Joke of the Day

"What is the fastest way to exit a car on the highway? Through the windshield"

"How many NRA members does it take to stop a 6-year-old paraplegic from stealing a candy bar? Nobody knows - they usually lose count at 800 rounds."

"I just violated myself in the shower. I didn't want to but rules are rules and I did drop the soap after all."

"The French military suffered a major loss today... Their largest white flag factory burned to the ground."

"How does trump like his eggs? Whites only"

"What do wooden whales eat? A plankton."

"*Runs a bath Me: ok, jump in 3: it's too hot *Adds cold water Me: Ok, get in 3: it's too cold Apparently I gave birth to Goldilocks."

"The older I get, the more sympathize with Squidward's anger."

"Football is like Sex your mom sucks at both"

"Paul Walker took up Zen Buddism not long before his death. . . He became one with a tree."