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Joke of the Day

"Oh, you said floppy DISK. *pulls pants back up* Yeah, I don't know what that is."

"I was expecting ""The Last Airbender"" to be a disappointment. I was not disappointed."

"What do you call a funny jar of sauce Lmayo"

"Relationship status: using the middle stall so someone has to sit next to me."

"What's a suicidal Russian's favorite drink? Cyka bleach"

"Someone stole my mood ring the other day... I still don't know how I feel about it"

"How much does a pirate pay for corn? A Buck-An-Ear"

"What do a pulse and an orgasm have in common? I don't care if she has one."

"Is that a booger in your nose? No, it's snot."

"Me: Ma'am your pet is loud. Lady: That's my baby. Me: Ma'am your pet baby is loud"