36588

Joke of the Day

"How do you call an intelligent blonde? A Labrador."

"I saw a middle aged man staring at a picture of his very first steps. With tears in his eyes, he told me he regrets ever replacing the steps with an elevator."

"What's the most annoying thing about making cheese? The curds get in the whey!"

"What's better than winning a gold medal in the quadriplegic (crippled) Olympics? Walking."

"My mom is the most hip and tech savvy person I know! She needs every possible search toolbar conceivable so the internet can keep up with her!"

"So I asked my roommate why life was so hard... (NSFW Language) He responded, ""How else would it fuck you?"""

"What do you call bears without ears? B."

"Death Joke ""My grandfather knew the exact time of the exact day of the exact year that he would die."" ""Wow, what an evolved soul! How did it come to him?"" ""The judge told him."""

"What did the man do after listening to a Pink Floyd album for two hours? Skip to the next track"

"I keep nacho cheese handy so in case I start to lose an argument I can pour it on my head and say ""You're arguing with nachos, you idiot""."