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Joke of the Day

"Since Trump got elected 2.5 million Americans want to leave the country That's 2.5 million jobs he's already made!"

"Boxed wine: Because corkscrews are dangerous after the second bottle."

"I hadn't been laid in a long time, so I slipped a girl a roofie at a bar. She still wouldn't have sex with me, she just wanted to sleep."

"I found my stolen briefcase pretty quickly... You could say it was a brief case."

"A lion would NEVER cheat on his mate But a Tiger Wood. XD"

"PSA: If you have kids, do not label the box of your ...ahem.. special items ""Toys"". It's very awkward to explain."

"What's the difference between sand and period blood? I can't gargle with sand."

"What did the ghost say to the bees? Boo Bees"

"A Cuban, a Canadian, and a homophobic walk into a bar The bartender says, ""What'll it be, Senator Cruz?"""

"Why didn't Sally become a prostitute to pay her bills? Because it was Plan B."