19854

Joke of the Day

"Why didn't Sally become a prostitute to pay her bills? Because it was Plan B."

"What to you call a fat computer? A dell"

"Her: I saw this Yoda pen & I thought of you. Me: WHY? YOU THINK I'M 8 OR SOMETHING? Her: No, sorry... Me: Hey, hey, hey! Leave the pen."

"The Feds say that marijuana has no accepted medical use, overlooking how it could help 20 million unemployed Americans not give a shit."

"What did the Mexican fire chief call his two sons? jose and josB (Hose A & Hose B)"

"At the library: Librarian: you have 45 cents in late fees. Me: (adjusts bow tie then slides 50 cents across the table) Keep the change"

"Why do French tanks have rear-view mirrors? So they can see the battle."

"My favorite romantic comedy sub-genre is ""Hugh Grant falls in love with someone for no reason."""

"The NRA will now be arming fetuses in utero so that they can defend themselves against abortions"

"What was the executioner's favorite shampoo? Head and shoulders."