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Joke of the Day

"A mushroom walks into a bar... The bartender says ""hey, we don't serve your kind here"". The mushroom says ""why not? I'm a 'fungi' Bam, you've all been PUNNED!"

"I told the barista my name was ""Britney Spears"" just for giggles and he handed me my coffee with ""annoying white girl"" written on it instead"

"LOUD PART, quiet part, LOUD PART, quiet part. There, I wrote a symphony. What's the big deal?"

"This morning some bloke drove up to my house in a huge lorry and dumped off a massive pile of lego blocks. I'm so furious I don't know what to make of it."

"Why was Stalin literally worse than Hitler? Because Hitler at least wrote his own books"

"Dwarfs and midgets have very little in common."

"What do you call a sick bird? An illegal."

"Whats the Difference between Acne and A priest? Whats the Difference between acne and a priest? Acne wont come on your face unil youre 13."

"- The DC Cinematic Universe"

"Creep yelling from window: ""HEY SEXY WHERE YO MAN?"" Me yelling back: ""HE DEAD"" Him: ""WHAT HAPPENED TO HIM?"" Me: ""HE YELLED AT ME"""