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Joke of the Day
"What did Russians used to light their houses with before candles? Electricity."
Next Joke
"[telling a scary story to a group of moths] and when she opened the door..[holds flashlight to face] she- AH GET OFF OF ME YOU GUYS"
"How do you separate two blind people fighting? You just simply shout: ""I'm supporting the one with the knife!"""
"Why does a one legged man make a terrible therapist? Because he has less understanding."
"Why are the news media like a prostitute? Because they are good at making stuff up."
"So, I picked up that new Tekken game and it wasn't challenging at all. Tekken is too easy, but that's the way it is."
"Girl: Do you have protection? Me: Um like a sword?"
"How did Moses feel after falling for a craigslist scam? Egypt."
"Why shouldn't happy people hang out with crustaceans? They get crabby! Badum tsss."
"Went to a parade. For an hour, bored people on floats waved. For an hour, My 2-year-old waved back. It was the greatest day of her life."