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Joke of the Day

"Ah Monday morning, the hideously ugly, unwanted child of the week. I'm torn between pity and the feeling of violating something with a broom"

"Did you know people are getting paid to mention products in their Facebook statuses?.....That's as crazy as the low low prices at Dave's Furniture Emporium"

"To find your real porn name, take the translation of your Chinese letter tramp stamp & add to the name of your mom's 4th alcoholic husband"

"Girl, are you astrophysics? Because I don't know enough about you to finish this joke."

"How well did the sailor do in school? Not bad actually, he got high 'C's."

"What does the Sargeant of the Knowledge division always tell his troops to get? in formation"

"I was going to tell a joke in chemistry class today but I couldn't think of one. All the good chemistry jokes argon."

"i'm supposed to train the intern to do what i do every day, but i'm not sure how comfortable i am giving him my twitter & facebook passwords"

"How many cops does it take the screw in a lightbulb? The same number it takes to screw public confidence in law enforcement"

"You can always predict what antigay protesters will say. But never how they'll spell it."