50121

Joke of the Day

"I've asked a question, ignored the answer and been too ashamed to ask again, way more times than I'd like to admit."

Next Joke
 
"What's the difference between a garbanzo bean and a chickpea? Donald Trump has never had a garbanzo bean on him."
"It's a shame Jerry Hall never got it on with Vidal Sassoon Then she'd have completed rock, paper and scissors."
"Reasons why i never let my girlfriend touch my iPhone. 1) I don't have iPhone. 2) I don't have a girlfriend."
"There are some benefits to having alzheimers For example, you get to meet new people constantly."
"Me: Just a glass of water Scientist waiter: You mean a glass of... yourself? You see, the body is made up of ok ok sit down I'll bring it"
"If a pregnant friend tells you what the kid's name will be just whisper ""AND THE DARK LORD'S PROPHECY WILL BE FULFILLED."" They love that."
"Out of my mind. Back in five minutes."
"Sucks the USA lost. Now we can't keep watching TV at work."
"""I'm a good person, obviously."" --everyone"