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Joke of the Day

"Dear whoever is playing sweet child o' mine at 2:30 in the night at full blaring volume to disturb the whole neighborhood......NICE!"

"Wife: It's not a chick flick! Me: was the movie released in February? W: yes. M: are they standing back to back on the cover? W: sigh.. yes"

"Why did Sally fall off her swing? Because she had no arms"

"What do pancakes do when they are scared? They crepe themselves ;D"

"Why does Kim Jong Un so quick to anger? He's been holding in his shit for years"

"I organised a 3 some last night. There were a couple of no shows but I still had a good time."

"How Am I Doing? I'll Tell You How I'm Doing Volumes: 1-8"

"I have a difficult time living in buildings near many neighbors I think I have an apartment complex."

"Like most people my age, I'm 23. ."

"Just got banned from B&Q, some dickhead in an orange apron came up to me and asked if I wanted decking!! Lucky I got the first punch in."