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Joke of the Day

"How Am I Doing? I'll Tell You How I'm Doing Volumes: 1-8"

"Apologies to Rudyard Kipling but . . . If you can keep your head when all about you are losing theirs. . . . maybe you don't understand the gravity of the situation."

"How does every racist joke start? *Looks around the immediate area*"

"I just finished writing a Broadway musical about the dictionary. It's the ultimate play on words."

"Why didn't the dog want to play football ? It was a boxer !"

"How many dead Hookers does it take to change a lightbulb? Not 8, since my basement is still dark."

"What is a tick's favorite fruit? Lime."

" All in all, it's just a... nother post on my wall. "

"What do Princess Di's coffin and a Queen Bee have in common? They're both filled with Royal Jelly."

"the iPhone 8 won't even come with headphones you'll have to imagine you're listening to music"