34696

Joke of the Day

"Facebook is where you'll find people sharing screenshots of sarcastic tweets and commenting ""stupid""."

"When Miley Cyrus gets naked and licks a hammer..it's ""art"" and ""music"". But when I do it...I'm ""wasted"", and ""have to leave Home Depot""."

"My wife decided to take up painting Not to be outdone, I became an art critic."

"I once submitted 10 puns to a contest to see which one would win. Unfortunately, no-pun-in-ten-did."

"My therapist cries ""Why me?"" for the full hour."

"We all know that 6 is afraid of 7 because 7 ate 9, but do you know why 9 is afraid of 6? Because she bit his dick last time"

"The Internets recipe for Cream Pie is different than my Grandmothers"

"Hmm. Nissan Altima TV commercial boasts NASA inspired zero-gravity seats. But if you're in zero gravity, you don't need seats"

"I'm so sick and tired of my friends who can't handle their alcohol. The other night they dropped me 3x while carrying me to the car!"

"What starts with ""f"" and ends with ""uck"" Fire truck!"