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Joke of the Day

"When Miley Cyrus gets naked and licks a hammer..it's ""art"" and ""music"". But when I do it...I'm ""wasted"", and ""have to leave Home Depot""."

"2 drunk guys were walking on the train tracks ""hey john, this stairs are reallly long"" ""don't worry, here comes the elevator"""

"It's embarrassing that 90% of my Google history is just words I wasn't sure how to spell, and yes I googled embarrassing."

"Mermaids and their boobs This one has always been a hit for me out in the field, in a goofy way. Why do mermaids wear seashells? Because their boobs are too big for B-shells!"

"This is the story of a man named Jack. Jack was, well lets just say he was a repairman. One day while repairing the shingles on a rooftop, Jack got stuck. Will you help Jack off?"

"Q: Where do cows go on Friday nights? A: To the moovies."

"How come Peter Pan keeps on flying? Because he Neverlands"

"What has 7 arms and sucks? Def leppard"

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Bing ! Bing who ? Bing down the house !"

"I am a feminist. Unless you tell me to go and bring you a sandwich. I'm also a waitress."