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Joke of the Day

"My friend and I applied for work at the new submarine factory. I don't know if we'll get jobs, but we'll see what surfaces."

"A white lie: ""No dear, your bum doesn't look big in those jeans""."

"I'm gonna start giving bad news to people in that cute, high pitched voice I use to talk to kids and dogs."

"Girl Dance Girl: You would be a good dancer except for two things. Boy: What are the two things? Girl: Your feet."

"Why being called handsome is an insult When you have a 3 way, it's called a threesome When you have a 2 way, it's called a twosome When you have a 1 way, it's called a handsome"

"The seven dwarves are sitting in the bathtub, feeling happy... ...so, Happy gets out."

"An Irishwoman gave birth to triplets and named them Nat,Pat and Tat. However when she tried to breastfeed them she found out there was no tit for Tat."

"Why did Hitler kill himself? He finally got the gas bill."

"Origin of Dad Jokes What and when was the very first dad joke?"

"What's the difference between me and a calendar? You can't fuck the shit out of a calendar"