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Joke of the Day

"What does walking a tight rope and receiving a blow job from your mother-in-law have in common? In both cases it is strongly advisable to not look down"

"You know something, Jon Snow Lord Commander: ""So, Jon Snow, is it true you have lain with a Wildling girl?"" Jon Snow: ""Yes, sir, it is true. But I have no Ygrittes."""

"Why don't blind people go skydiving? Because it scares the shit out of their dogs."

"Why do Women get So Big when they're Pregnant? To give their kids a wide birth."

"I went for sushi with Luke Skywalker and he was struggling with chopsticks... ""Use the fork, Luke!"" I said."

"(OC) What's the dirtiest part of a Jedi? The Forceskin."

"I insulted a communist. I told him he was dressed ""classy"""

"Why is Hillary Clinton running for President? Because it's easier than running from Law Enforcement."

"I was going to have a wank at the Vatican while I was there on vacation. But I thought about it and it has probably been done before and I would hate to be seen as the second coming."

"What do you call an English teacher who used to have anxiety? Past tense."