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Joke of the Day

"So Helen Keller walks into a bar Then she walks into a table. Then she walks into a lamp. Then she walks into the wa- ok, you get the idea."

"What said a person who got run over by a car? ""I'm tired""."

"If you were killed by a cop... ..which store would you want looted in your memory?"

"I like my drinks like I like my women With big cups."

"So I've heard the AFL player Chris Judd gets women pretty wet... But I reckon Adam Goodes gets them Damper."

"I'm glad I found out it's illegal to destroy US currency. I was about to feed $50 bills through a shredder."

"Why is unemployment rising in Jamaica? Because they're jahbless!"

"What did the dad say to Michael Jackson at the beach? ""Get out of my son!"""

"So I asked my friend, if you could be in the sun as long as possible and not get sun burnt but the majority of the world hates you, would you do it? And my friend said yeah. Okay you're black."

"Q: What do they use frozen band-aids for? A: Cold cuts."