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Joke of the Day

"HEY TWITTER IF I WANTED 10,000 CHARACTERS THAT I WASN'T INTERESTED IN I WOULD START WATCHING GAME OF THRONES"

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"How many goals did Germany score? A Brazillion."
"COP: ""Do you know why I pulled you over?"" ME: ""So it wouldn't be windy when we talked."""
"I should've listened to my dad. Friend: What did he say? Me: How the fuck would I know? I didn't listen."
"How do Japanese chihuahuas say hello? Konnichihuahua"
"Why the Chinese aren't democratic Because their leaders can't bring themselves to say 'We need to have a great election; People will come from all over the country'"
"Where does bad light end up? in prism"
"So I went to my Dr. and said I needed something for my joints... He handed me a lighter"
"What is the etymology of the word ""politics""? *Poli*, from the Greek *polloi*, meaning ""Many"". And *Ticks*, from English, meaning ""little bloodsucking creatures."""
"Clown: Why are you wearing such a large shirt? Second Clown: I always perform in the big top."