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Joke of the Day

"Damn boy are you a banker? Because I really just want you to leave me a loan."

"How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? They can't, cause they can't change anything. (Just told to me by my 12 year old son.)"

"Two Cannibals are eating a clown. One turns to the other and asks... Does this taste funny to you?"

"I've wanted to have a conversation with my wife about getting each of us Segways to ride around town in... But whenever I bring it up she always changes the topic."

"You know that schizophrenic hobo that has nonsensical conversations with himself? That's Twitter in real life."

"Why do you want to be buried at sea? Because my wife says she wants to dance on my grave."

"How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two. The question is: how do they get in there?"

"How do you tell the difference between a normal potato from a slutty potato? The slutty one has the sticker that reads Idaho."

"Went to my first fight Club tonight, was so much fun, got there a bit late so I missed the first bit of induction. But wow was it fun! Anyone who is keen or wants to know more, hit me up for details!"

"I was gonna post a joke about you... But I just realized it doesn't mean anything."