145369

Joke of the Day

"I've wanted to have a conversation with my wife about getting each of us Segways to ride around town in... But whenever I bring it up she always changes the topic."

"What does a black guy do after sex? 15 to life"

"My girlfriend said I didn't respect her freedom enough So I told her to stop rattling in her cage"

"It sounded like someone on a moped was approaching but it turned out to be 1,000 bees on a regular bicycle."

"What's the difference between a Women's cross country team and midget geniuses? The midget geniuses are cunning runts."

"An Amnesiac Walks Into... An amnesiac walks into a bar. He goes up to a beautiful blonde and says, ""So, do I come here often?"""

"Whats the difference between a Pimple and a Catholic Priest? One will wait until you're 13 to come all over your face."

"The Teen Choice Awards has to be the most legit award show because teens always make the best choices."

"The human liver can withstand up to 97% damage and make a full recovery. Yet not one doctor will accept this as an argument for alcoholism."

"What did the tomato say to the ear of corn? Nothing, as tomatoes lack any ability to communicate."