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Joke of the Day
"Everyone in my house has diarrhea I guess it runs in the family"
Next Joke
"I miss being a sperm. I wish life was simple again."
"As a young child my mom told me I could be anything I wanted to be. It turns out that the police call this identity theft."
"Opinions are like butts *gently rubs your opinion*"
"You can't make blanket statements & expect people to take you seriously, but since I hate clowns I'm pretty sure everyone else does too."
"Girl on my bus has a therapy dog with a marked vest and I was like, ""what kind of therapy is he in?"" because of course I said that"
"What did Mr. Orange say to Anna Banana when she asked what his first name was in rhyme world? Fuck off"
"I bet you haven't heard of this new movie Constipation... ...it hasn't come out yet."
"What happened to the man who tried to cross a lioin with a goat ? He had to get a new goat !"
"Poured Tresemme on a spider in the shower & scooted him down the drain, he reemerged w/ voluminous hair & screamed at me in a French accent"