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Joke of the Day
"When I found out my toaster wasn't waterproof.... I was shocked"
Next Joke
"*sees baby* *feels sad that my kids aren't babies anymore* *sees look of exhausted despair in baby's parents eyes* *sadness evaporates*"
"You know what's the biggest turn off for me? Consent."
"God: thou shall not kill Me: but my coworker whistles all day God: still no Me: he says ciao instead of goodbye God: do what you have to"
"A man gave me 79 protons Thanks for the gold!"
"Why did the worm want to learn kung-fu? so he could flip the bird"
"How much time did you spend on your hair before you took a selfie of your boobs?"
"My favorite sex position is solely based on how bad your breath is."
"Today is the anniversary of the discovery of Uranus! Hershel was actually looking for the clitoris but found Uranus instead."
"When my boss asked me who is the stupid one, me or him? I told him everyone knows he doesn't hire stupid people."