54236

Joke of the Day

"*sees baby* *feels sad that my kids aren't babies anymore* *sees look of exhausted despair in baby's parents eyes* *sadness evaporates*"

"Did you hear about the two radio antennas that got married? Well they said the wedding was okay, but the reception was awesome!"

"If you cross a telephone and a pair of scissors what do you get? Snippy answers."

"Riding a horse can be difficult. You could always choose to ride a mule instead... but that would be half-assed."

"A clown and a little girl walk through a dark forest. The girl says, ""I'm scared!"" The clown replies, ""you think you're scared? I have to walk back alone!"""

"Why do black people like fried chicken? Because it tastes good."

"Why are crabs always tired? Because they sleep in snatches."

"I realized I needed an altitude adjustment... ...so I booked the next flight out of town."

"Relationship status: My wife calls me her chauffeur because I drive her nuts..."

"If you ever decide to commit suicide by jumping from a building, the least you could do is wear a cape first."