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Joke of the Day

"my default response when someone questions a risky text of mine is ""sorry, I was drunk."" But now everyone thinks I'm an alcoholic so..shit."

"Why does the Catholic Church have so much money? Because Jesus saves."

"Facebook account for sale, friends included."

"Did you hear why Rosie O'Donnell got arrested? Airport security lifted up her dress and found 200 pounds of crack. - OPRAH AND AIRPORT SECURITY"

"What does a gamer call the zombie apocalypse? The end of DayZ"

"Never go to a place that has burgers, sushi, chicken wings and donuts on one menu. Never."

"Tell me somethig dirty... VW Jetta 2.0 TDI"

"Who has a long nose wears a mask and sits tall in the saddle? The Lone Aardvark!"

"[Request] Guys I need a knock knock joke that ends with a pun relating to Autumn Started the joke but just realized I didn't have an ending planned. Don't fail me reddit!"

"I went to a homeless themed fancy dress last night. It was shit.Fcuk all food or drink and we stood outside in the rain all night."