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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear why Rosie O'Donnell got arrested? Airport security lifted up her dress and found 200 pounds of crack. - OPRAH AND AIRPORT SECURITY"

"Homosexuals please help me. I think my hamsters are gay. How do I let them know it's okay?"

"Why didn't the cellphone attend the wedding? He heard the reception was going to be terrible..."

"why don't programmers like nature? because it has too many bugs"

"I think it's weird how President Obama appointed George Clooney Secretary Of Handsome. #DNC"

"In our wedding, I'll invite his ex and be like ""Still believe you can get him back?"""

"Q: If called to testify in a trial how long will it before before Clinton commits perjury? A: When he's sworn in."

"Shoveling snow would be so much more fun if it were porn."

"What do you call a jewish pokemon trainer? Ash"

"The bills are washed, the dishes are paid, the laundry's in the oven. I'm going to bed."