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Joke of the Day

"Parents are hiring drug-sniffing dogs to find their kids' drugs. I couldn't do it. My kid already doesn't trust me, according to her diary."

Next Joke
 
"the best part about kissing a girl is that fun little 30yr build-up right before it happens"
"Mickey asks Minnie for divorce Minnie: Are you fucking crazy!? Mickey: No, i'm fucking Daisy."
"All the Kardashian girls sound like they've just been lobotomized and can only remember the words ""I just feel like..."""
"How come Smokey the Bear doesn't have any children? Every time his wife gets hot he beats her with a shovel."
"*logs on* jesus christ *logs off*"
"*sees cute doctor in scrubs* *falls over* HELP! I need mouth-to-mouth! Doc: ... Me: Aren't you obligated to help? Husband: GET UP!"
"Knock knock. Who's there? She. She who? She'd ............................ get it"
"A forgetful guy walks into a bar... ..Hm?. Oh shit,I've forgotten it!."
"So... Hillary Clinton is giving this FBI agent a blow job at the Democratic Nation Convention ... Hey...Chill out man...It's politics, that's how it works !!!"