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Joke of the Day

"Why did the elephant paints it's toes red? So he could hide in the cherry tree."

"Getting old sucks. I walked into the bathroom and forgot what I went in there for. And then I shit my pants."

"Pete and Repete are in a boat together. Pete jumps out of the boat. Who is left in the boat?"

"What's the difference between a bindle of cocaine and a baby?? Eric Clapton wouldn't let one fall out the window"

"[NSFW] Yesterday I gave a surprise bukkake party to my roommate... ...everyone came. You should have seen her face."

"Did you hear about the leper hockey game? There was a face off in the corner."

"What's the difference between a daydreamer and a pervert? A daydreamer stares out of windows."

"Girl: ""Is that a gun in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?"" Guy: ""Both, now get in the van."""

"What is Pink and lies on the doormat? Whitney Houston's Valentines Day Cards"

"My dad everyone... Dad: U at home? Me: No. Dad: Where? Me: Hairdresser. Dad: Aaahhh. They putting pants an blouse on ur hair ? Get it. Hair dresser. Lol Ugh."