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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the leper hockey game? There was a face off in the corner."

"Why does Helen Keller have trouble driving She's dead."

"Two native-american boys are walking through a forest One spots a bug on the ground, points to it and says to the other, ""ew, squash it!"" The other says, ""no, i'm pretty sure it's a bug."""

"Someone tried to sell me a coffin today. I told him that's the last thing I need."

"""So what do you do?"" I'm a wordsmith ""A what?"" A writer. I deal with words. How about you? ""Oh I'm a uh... weedsmith"""

"What do you get if you cross a pig with a karate expert? A pork chop."

"Who is the fastest runner in history. Adam - because he was the first in the human race."

"My problem is, I'm about 30% stud, and 70% muffin."

"I love my toilet. We've been through a lot of shit together."

"Walked by a restaurant where they were using iPads for menus. How cheap are iPads now? More importantly, how expensive are menus?"