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Joke of the Day

"Americans should be asking Santa for better presidential candidates and nothing else."

"Call me crazy, but the last person who did is still in a full body cast, so it's up to you."

"What did the Mexican family get for Christmas? Deported"

"I kicked my wife off the bed when she was fast asleep to show her the man of her dreams couldn't save her."

"Why does a chicken coop always have two doors? Because if it had four doors it would be a chicken sedan."

"I told my mum I was goingto make a car out of spaghetti She was really surprised when I drove pasta"

"Your eyes are as blue as my toilet water at home."

"How do you blindfold an Asian person? You put floss over his eyes."

"My girlfriend keeps calling me immature. I guess the saying is true. You are what you eat."

"What did Noah do with all the poop? Threw it overboard. it formed the UK. Taken from here: http://www.reddit.com/r/atheism/comments/240xyy/brilliant_neil_degrasse_tyson_quote/ch2kcxl"