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Joke of the Day

"My friend starting hearing bagpipes in the back of his head I swear, I think he has Scotsophrenia."

"A severed foot... ...is the ultimate stocking stuffer. - Mitch Hedberg"

"Schrodinger's cat walks into a bar. And doesn't."

"Don't give people who take selfies a hard time they're just trying to save face"

"Pretty sure that ""Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory"" is the kid's version of ""Saw""."

"What does a arsonist and a bartender have in common? For special occasions, their cocktails are on the house."

"Helpline? I've just pushed a piece of bacon into my disk drive! Has the computer stopped working? No but there's a lot of crackling."

"George Washington's underage brother got into taverns by using the dollar as a fake ID."

"The hostess said to sit wherever I want, but the couple at this table are giving each other weird looks and have totally stopped talking."

"Who is the poorest in England? The Tooth Fairy!"