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Joke of the Day
"Because telescopes work using mirrors... We'll never know if there are any space vampires."
Next Joke
"Anne Frank's famous last words. Brb, door"
"No thanks Cupid. If I wanted butterflies and my heart skipping beats, I would do something less ridiculous like lose my phone."
"u have one (1) new dad. click here to accept Todd."
"February 29th is just like a dead beat dad. It only shows up every four years."
"Yah I ordered a large pizza but it's thin crust/ light cheese so basically it's a salad ."
"If I ever got stranded on an island, I could totally use the glare that bounces off the whiteness of my legs to signal for help."
"I use proper syntax and punctuation on all of my tweets, unless I am in danger of exceeding the 140 character limit... & then u no how it b"
"What's the difference between a happy person and ET? A happy person has a light heart and ET has a heart light"
"Mattel has a campaign urging girls to pursue their limitless potential. It's called You Can Be Anything Except A Woman With Barbie's Body."