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Joke of the Day

"I don't know what it is, but there is something strangely sexy about the way my grandad gets down doggystyle so I can wipe him. nevermind."

"President Obama says his daughters need minimum wage jobs to ""learn what it means to work."" May I suggest the same for members of Congress?"

"What do you call a blonde with half a brain? Gifted"

"10 year old: What was it like? Me: What was what like? 10: Being alive in the 1900's? Me: Go to your room."

"I tried to take photos at a strip club Everyone turned out to be over-exposed."

"What do you get when BMW, Volkswagen, and Callaway design a car together? A Mini Golf."

"An atheist, a vegan, and an anti-vaxxer walk into a bar... I only know because they told everyone within two minutes."

"What is Beethoven's favorite food? Ba-Na-Na-NAAAAAAAAAAAA"

"As I was paying for a 15 year old escort I thought... ...I'm getting a really good deal on this car."

"I told my girlfriend to make a sextape together. She agreed. It became a vine"