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Joke of the Day

"[biologists find beached whale] its a new species what can we call it? [surfer walks by] yo killer whale bro [biologists look at each other]"

Next Joke
 
"What's the worst thing to hear after you have sex with Steve Buscemi? ""I'm not Steve Buscemi."""
"Why do ants rarely, if ever, get sick? Because of their tiny little anty bodies."
"I'm right 97% of the time. So who cares about the other 4%?"
"""Oh my god! That guy's dead! Oh wait, he's totally fine."" (someone watching soccer for the first time)"
"if you ever want to witness an Oscar worthy performance, ask any person from twitter their follower count and watch them pretend to not know"
"Everyone type it with me: A lot is two words. A lot is two words. A lot is two words. A lot is two words. Good. Tomorrow: Irregardless."
"There are two types of people in this world. Those that need closure."
"mike hawk is huge !!!"
"All of the people complaining about Harriet Tubman being on the new $20 bill... Most likely don't see too many $20 bills."