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Joke of the Day

"Everyone type it with me: A lot is two words. A lot is two words. A lot is two words. A lot is two words. Good. Tomorrow: Irregardless."

"Treat me like a joke, and I'll leave you like it's funny."

"Tried to catch fog today Mist"

"Confucius Say: He who drop watch in toilet... Bound to have shitty time."

"Justin Bieber is coming out with an 'Unplugged album'? I hope it's the microphone that they unplug."

"Nerd joke nicca say wat?"

"i have two wives and i take care of them both equally and love them both equally. ain't that bigamy?"

"A man walks into a Doctor's office screaming, ""I'm a wigwam, I'm a TeePee, I'm a wigwam, I'm a TeePee!"" The Doctor Says, ""You're too Tense"""

"A woman walks into a bar and orders a drink called ""Innuendo"". So the barkeeper gives it to her."

"[ This one from the great /u/KingOfRibbles ] ""My sink was a bit dirty-"" ""-but all it needed was a little ...wiping!!!"""