26219

Joke of the Day

"My brother has muscular dystrophy and we got into an argument about religion I told him his argument is just as valid as his legs.... Weak."

"A quick way to get your kids to leave you alone is to say, ""I need to make your dentist appointment."""

"Carson: No it wasn't a friend it was a close family member. And I didn't stab her I froze her heart. ""Sir, that's the plot of Frozen."""

"Did you know it was women who coined the term, ""Bromance""? Yeah, basically the concept of friendship is so foreign to them that they created a new word for it."

"Two baby seals walk into a club"

"How do you put an elephant in a refrigerator? Step one: Open the door. Step two: Put the elephant in. Step three: Close the door."

"Chad always has an impeccable fashion sense, even when he's not trying People ask him how he does it and he tells them, ""Well, I didn't stay in the closet all those years for nothing""."

"My buddy said he'd give his right arm to be ambidextrous I can only admire such dedication."

"Adolescent Sex Limerick There once was a girl named Sue, who really knew how to screw. She would grab my little dick, make it as hard as a stick then ride it until I blew."

"I tripped on a ""slippery when wet"" sign today. I was floored by the irony."