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Joke of the Day

"Have you ever been to an Istanbul nightclub? I hear they're poppin' and a good place to get wasted!"

"George Carlin appeared to me in a dream and asked me ""How can there be such a thing as a one-way street when you can obviously cross a street either way?"""

"Shout out to all the Aussies over here! Want to hear a joke? :) Tony Abbott"

"Sure I'll send you a shirtless selfie. Just let me work out for 6 months real quick."

"The difference between cars and whales is that whales can swim and cars can't."

"Have you heard of the musical condoms? They started a rubber band."

"She left me a note, on the fridge... ""It's not working anymore, I'm leaving you"". I opened up the fridge and it is working. She left me for nothing, that idiot."

"My ""go to"" zoo joke I tell this to my wife and kids every time we go to a zoo... Q. What do you get when you cross an elephant with a rhino? A. Elephino"

"I'm convinced that this trip to Toronto will end with my being arrested for not being nice enough."

"Joke from my daughter Her: Why did the chicken cross the road? Me: Why? Her: To get to the ugly guy's house. Me:??? Her: Knock knock Me: Who's there? Her: It's the chicken!"