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Joke of the Day

"Why did the tea-bag fall down the hill? To steep."

"What did one cell say to its sister cell when she stepped on him? ""Mitosis !"""

"What kind of dog can turn on your car? Yorkies"

"What does the mayonnaise say to the refrigerator? Shut the door im dressing"

"If I've given you a card at your birthday party, know I bought it a half-hour ago and signed it on the dashboard of my car 5 minutes ago."

"Devil worshipper leader: ""Due to a typo we have summoned the wrong demon."" Stan: ""Hey there."""

"What's black and blue and floats down the river? A jew telling ethnic jokes."

"So, a squirrel walks into a bar- -k"

"What is this compound? Chemistry teacher drew this during class. http://imgur.com/fQyNg Don't know how to type spoilers, but maybe rot13 will do. Vg'f n cnenqbk."

"INTERVIEWER to job applicant: ""Do you think you could come up with any reason you want this job other than your parents want you out of their house?"""