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Joke of the Day

"Avril Lavigne and Chad Kroeger's engagement proves that not only is love blind, it's also deaf."

"Cats will be the hardest zombies to kill, with their -9 lives and all."

"Babies are like Starbucks because they're expensive as shit and yet you still forget them on the roof of your car"

"Amazing how in the last 30 years, the United States has completely transitioned from an industrial powerhouse to a brunch-based economy."

"currently imagining a redditor choking on an uncooked hotdog and trying to wheeze out ""epic fail"" before losing consciousness"

"What do a prostitute and a plumber have in common? They both service the john."

"What does a selfie stick and a tampon have in common? Both have a cunt at the end of them"

"Cleavage is the original Jedi Mind Trick."

"What's a good punch line to a Nazi themed anti-joke? Can you **not see** where I am going with this?"

"I like to shave my pubes... It helps reduce the wind resistance and makes me able to run faster. You haven't seen me on the news yet because I'm too fast."