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Joke of the Day
"Why are atoms so serious? Because they're no laughing matter."
Next Joke
"What is red... And smells like green paint? Red paint! Whats green, and smells like red paint? Green paint :) Can't believe how many time I switch to the second, and they don't get it!"
"No Girlfriend November was a success, now for Don't Date December, Just Me January, Forever Alone February, No Match March..... I got this."
"yes lassie? ""bark"" Timmy's in the well and you pissed in my slippers and you told me about Timmy first so I wouldn't get mad ""bark"" smart"
"Why did the Dad divorce his wife after she named their son? She named him Oedipus."
"An Atheist, a Vegan and a Crossfitter walk into a bar I only know that because they told everyone all about it within 2 minutes... and again..and again."
"""Don't kill it!"" my friend pleaded for a spider's life inside. So I carefully trapped it in a cup, brought it outside, then stomped on it."
"What happened to the trapeze artist that did drugs on the job? He got suspended."
"""And the Lord said unto John......."
"Go 3 days without your favorite thing. Then go 3 days without sleep. It turns out sleep is actually your favorite thing."