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Joke of the Day

"My drug dealer got me shoes for Christmas I dont know what they were laced with, but I've been tripping ever since"

"Ok, milk... Check! Potato salad... Check! Tomatoes... Check! ""Sir, can you wait for the total and just write one check please?"""

"And Grandmother, what a big thighs you have! *Wolf just starts crying*"

"How many Germans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just one. We're very efficient and not very humorous"

"Lay with me until everything crumbles and nothing but creeping ivy shields us from the incessant chatter of wandering cadavers. Bring snacks"

"He's a recovering alcoholic: recovering from last night!"

"Q: What is the difference between a smart blonde and a UFO? A: There have been sightings of UFOs."

"Why can't iron oxide get a date? Porque es FeO Little bilingual chemistry joke for you guys."

"Why did Vietnam revolt against the French? Because they knew they would Nguyen."

"I exercise by running up the street knocking on all the doors. Jehovah's fitness."