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Joke of the Day

"My mate just phoned me to tell me he had changed his name by deed poll to spinal column. ""Can I call you back?"" I asked."

"What's the difference between hot blooded manslaughter and cold blooded premeditated murder A few degrees."

"Why did Beethoven get rid of his chickens? All they said was ,""Bach, Bach, Bach"""

"If your joints pop, snap, and crack when you move your not old... Your just crispy. "

"I suggested a threesome to my girlfriend. ""That's fine,"" she said, ""Just not with another girl."" ""OK then, I'll call up James and Daniel."" I replied."

"When his I.Q. reaches 50, he should sell."

"I like my coffee like I like my men Tall, dark, strong, and inside of me."

"How do you make a gay fuck a woman? Shit in her cunt."

"Let me be the Stud in your life. I already have the STD, all I'm missing is u."

"Before you go to sleep tonight, don't forget to sprinkle gluten around your bed to keep away the hipsters."