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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a chickpea and a lentil? I've never paid to see a lentil."

"Women are like coffee beans: The coarser they are, the more you need to grind them, the finer they get."

"They say it's a joke, but, is it?"

"Who said the first million was the hardest? Was it hitler?"

"Why did the Spanish train aficionado blow up his trains? He had loco motives."

"I heard the comedians at Jamestown were pretty bad... The punchlines were so shitty everyone died."

"I forgot what I'm allergic to, I'm trying to remember... ..its on the tip of my tongue edit: I made this up haha just thought you'd like it."

"What were the 2 doctors who worked with Schrodinger called? A *paradox.*"

"Trump writing a thanksgiving tweet I love the people of Turkey!`` Related: https://twitter.com/realdonaldtrump/status/728297587418247168"

"1000 pounds of oranges. is a ton of oranges."